am i determined

Am I determined well I  will let you decide;  but I  must also  admit that I much prefer the word focused because determined Has an ever so slight wiff  of the  perjorativeness about it   about  it ,  from the moment  I wake up in the morning I  go to have a shower,  firstly  I scrub my  hair  thoroughly; and I  should say I  do not  intend to   be giving you full   anatomical run down of my washing procedure ; but I do not  believe in Shampoo ,  i mean why  does one remove  all of  the natural oils ,from your  hair  to  then, need to put back  a  whole heap of unnatural  ones    back in to your  hair with conditioner      and then I reach for my flannel which  sits on the small shelf in my shower but I  do this  with my eyes closed   so here I am trying to differentiate my flannel


from  the  various soaps and other paraphernalia that I  have accumulated  ; and no it is not like a hookers  boudoir because there was  a time when i could not feel anything with my hand .  and then   I try to  stretch up to touch the ceiling  with my hand  obviously as opposed to   with my  elbow and    I do this stretch up with my left arm , I  am   trying to  reach the ceiling  ,  because again there was a time when I   could not  lift my elbow above the horizontal  it really was just a useless club. so having done all of this ‘exercise’ I then brush my teeth which I do standing one leg and then i wear my smart shoes which i am absolutely  that i am absolutely terrible walking in but also they give me  an opportunity to practice tying my shoelaces  again , so once again  i find myself dresseing up  to  the 9’s or just 7’s really . snd lets examine that phrse  to give me  the opportunity  i mean it sonds like i sm being given a gift   when will it ever  end 



having checked the shower matt  Is  on the floor properly because If it is not  then I would end up looking like an elephant  dancing on ice     and i mention this purely for my mother who reads my blog and  I would want her  to know I am being sensible  ( another word  I hate : I mean who in their right mind or wrong mind   as  in  my case   would want that on  their tomb stone , here lies  an incredibly sensible man , or  have a eulogy based on sensibility,   and


I  do my teeth whilst looking like the can can girls in las  Vegas  where I kick up  one leg at a   time practicing my balance obviously ;  and also  torville and  Deane the Olympic figure  ice skating champions do not have anything  to  worry  about here;  and why are they called  can  can girls and here goes my knights move thinking  a sign of schizophrenia . but I hasten to add that  hat I have always had this thinking pattern but I  do not   have, schizophrenia  and    nor  have I   ever had schizophrenia and then there is  my coffee drinking which has become stratospheric and again; I blame my  determination  here, – it is because everything that goes with brewing my coffee is on my left .  so  I get to practice using my left   arm and hand quite a lot with making my coffee , and then lastly  there is my balance has been so truly dreadful util recently> I then  I spend the rest of the of the morning    making myself almost sick with dizziness , as I  shake  my head back  and forth . whilst looking at  a fixed spot on the wall, and this  is my vestibulo-ocular exercises designed to help me equilibrate  my brain with the  actual world as opposed to the one that I  am perceiving , and as such I used to believe  the vertical was   30 degrees to the left and  i would always  lean to the left   and , so once again it was not exactly complicated why I  was always leaning to  the left; but now I  am feeling like  I am being pulled to my left

and   in the evening  when I   wander off to bed I always   do  my exercises again they include balance and the  trunk strengthening exercise





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