do not look back

Living with and living through and i have lived through the trauma but now I am living with it well unsurprisingly  it is the latter that is by far the worst and there is  the long interminable . continuance of a life that I   just do not think I should be living  but worse than that it is s a life that I do not want  to have to be live  it is not  just the separation from my friends and family it is the relative isolation from them  all.


now I am from Australia   . where I grew up and it is here that my real friends are. Those who really know me and who I am and more importsnly,

know where I came from: and


it is strange. I am always told I need to look forwards but it is one’s history that predicates one’s future or at   least one’s reactions in  the future and it is this that drives me forwards  trying to ensure my life’s travail’s do not   impact too much   on my children , but it is  a great thanks I must give  thanks to my wife for ensuring toy are  still lively but tht would be   massive understatement or a very great   misrepresentation   of the facts


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